This is my why

The older I get, the more I realize how important it is to live life following your true purpose. Finding your way is not always easy. We have so many voices out there telling us, prodding us or even pointing the way to the life we should be living. But the only voice that matters is the one inside your head. Are you listening? I mean, really listening and paying attention?

Are you really listening to the voice inside your head?

I believe I'm one of the lucky ones who discovered my life’s mission at a young age. And while I’ve stumbled and fallen along the way, I never lost sight of what that is. But before I talk about that, I need to dive into my childhood and share a little bit of my history. 

When I was in fifth grade, my teacher gave the class an assignment to write a paper. I don’t remember all the specifics, but I do remember that I chose to write about the panda bears. As I did my research, I learned the plight of these cuddly black and white bears - how their numbers were dwindling due to deforestation and population growth. I wrote a proposal on how I could solve this problem. In the mind of a ten year old child, it was easy. Set up a table at the base of the mountain where the panda bears live and stop anyone from further destroying the habitat and developing the land. Simple, right? 

Well, that was just the beginning of my awareness for my love of animals. Like so many adolescents, I struggled with finding my place amongst my peers. I was probably more insecure than many of my classmates, and I definitely was one of the shiest kids in my class. I struggled with fitting in and feeling like I was well liked…or even liked at all. My self-confidence was low - something I eventually outgrew, but only as a young adult. My teenage years were tough, to say the least. I know I fought depression to boot and often wondered if my life would ever get any better.

While at the time puberty seemed to be a very painful experience, looking back, I’m glad I went through everything I did. I believe it made me a more compassionate, emphatic and caring person. Getting through those years wasn’t easy though. And the single thing that probably helped me the most was a cat. Yes, a crossed-eye, loud mouth siamese named Ke-O-ke. 

She was born a year before me. I’m sure when I came along, she wondered what was this creature that cried, smelled and babbled. Then once I was crawling and could pull her tail, her ears, her fur, she probably hated me. But eventually I got bigger and calmer and we became the best of friends. Even though she was my parents' cat, the baby before me, she ended up being mine. She hung out in my room during the day, followed me everywhere and slept beside me every night. 

She was the one I told my secrets to.

She was the one I told my secrets to, who listened to my sobs whenever I cried, who made me feel like I mattered when so many days I wondered if anyone really loved me. She didn’t care that I had a face full of angry red welts otherwise known as pimples, was moody because of PMS (or just all the time!), or that all the girls, except me, had gone to the movies. She didn’t care if I was the most popular (I wasn’t) or the best dressed (I wasn’t), she still greeted me at the door with her purrs when I came home from school. 

When I doubted anyone would miss me if I ran away, I knew she would. When I felt alone, she was the one who kept me company. When I didn’t feel I had anyone to talk to, it was Ke-O-Ke who meowed at me. You see, she didn’t see me the way I saw myself. She didn’t judge me the way I judged myself. She loved me in a way I couldn’t.

And now that I’m all grown up, I still struggle with self-worth sometimes. Don’t we all? But isn’t that what we love about our furry best friends? They love us unconditionally. They stand beside us even when we make mistakes. They don’t care if we are single, married, are parents or not. It doesn’t matter if we are dressed to the nines or wearing yesterday’s dirty clothes. Or if we take them to the park in a fancy SUV or a beat up old car. They don’t care if we make an appearance at friday night’s happenings around town or stay home curled up with a good book. They make us laugh, give us purpose and make a difference in our lives. In a way we sometimes can’t do for ourselves. 

It’s no accident that dog is God spelled backwards.

I don’t think it’s an accident that dog is God spelled backwards. While I can’t say for sure there is a God, I do believe in something bigger than myself. I believe this higher power, or Supreme Being, created me. And in His or Her eyes, I am perfect in every imperfect way. 

I also believe that one of the struggles every human being faces, is the ability to see ourselves the way our Supreme Being does. The way our dogs (and cats and other pets) do. That we are worthy of life, love and human experiences. I believe that every thing happens for a reason. It all serves to get us to the point where we believe and know that we are enough. That we are all connected. That we all matter. Our life purpose is to discover who we are, to unearth the treasures hidden deep within ourselves and share them with the world. 

For some of us, the way to this truth is though the furry best friends we meet, care for and love along the way. They teach us so much about life. About ourselves. About human kind. About connection. Because in the end, the only true thing that that matters is love.

The only true thing that matters is love.

This is my why. Why I’ve made a career out of working with animals. Why I am a photographer. And a pet photographer in particular. To capture the connection, the bond we share with these creatures who play such a huge role in our lives. To show you what they see in you. And what you see in them. Your teachers, your protectors, your best friends. Because animals matter. And so do you.


Lessons from the dog - Listen

Sometimes I find I'd rather talk to my dog more than to another human. It's not that I don't like the company of other people, but in today's busy society it can feel like no one really listens anymore. Ever notice a family at a restaurant that is too busy sending text messages and checking social media updates to have a conversation with each other? Or maybe you're talking to a co-worker and you can see from the look in his face that his mind is elsewhere and you doubt he's heard a word you've said. It's frustrating and downright hurtful.

Dogs are great listeners. They perk their ears right up when they hear your voice. Maybe you even get that coveted head tilt as well. You have their full attention and you know it. We should be more like them. 

Really listen when someone is talking. Pay attention to their words instead of thinking about what you want to say next. Dogs don't interrupt and we shouldn't either. They never get bored and walk away. They listen for as long as we are talking. And they watch our body language. They know if we are talking about something sad and maybe will give you a hug to make you feel better. Ever have some super exciting news but no one is home to share it with, so you tell your dog first instead? And in between your squeals of delight they bark and howl right along with you? No, they don't understand what you're saying, but they totally get what you're feeling. 

Listening is important for long lasting relationships. Look at the people in your life. If you have a friend who only talks about herself, how often do you want to get together with her? I went out on a date with a guy once who never stopped talking about himself. If I shared a story, he interrupted me to share a story of his own. And when he finished, he never asked me what the ending to my story was. Apparently, he thought I had a great time and asked to go out on a second date. Without hesitation I said no. Why would I? It was clear he didn't give an oomph about anyone but himself. 

So how about it? While I enjoy the perks of having a smart phone sometimes, I make it a point to put it away so I can enjoy the conversation with my friends and family. And be a better listener.

Cannabis for pets?

The newest and possibly the fastest growing group of users of hemp based products might be in your own home! Have you ever thought about giving medical cannabis to your pets? If your pet is suffering from one of many ailments, it might be worth considering. 

I became aware of medical cannabis for dogs when reading Modern Dog and noticing all the advertisements for various hemp based products. I have to admit I was taken aback…why would I give my dog marijuana? Not really understanding the difference, I decided to do a little research. And here’s what I found. 

Medicical hemp and marijuana come from the same plant - cannabis sativa. It contains many different cannabinoids, including THC (tetrahydrocannabinol) and CBD (cannabidol).  THC is the psychoactive component and what gives people that “high” after smoking a joint. CBD is not psychoactive and is what we’re interested in for our pets.

CBD is found in hemp seed and hemp seed oil and is used to help treat dogs with a variety of issues including pain, arthritis, anxiety, seizures, nausea, cancer and other conditions. it works pretty much the same way as it does in our bodies. Like us, dogs and cats have a endocannabinoid system. CBD acts by targeting receptors in the brain, central nervous system and immune cells that stimulate relaxing effects. It comes in the form of tinctures, topical, or edibles. Tinctures are administered orally, topical is put on the skin and edibles, the easiest option, is found in treats. 

While there hasn’t been much research yet, so far it does seem to be making a difference in pets’ lives. Because all 50 states have approved the use of hemp based CBD products, this is legal to purchase. Dosage amounts vary, so the best advice is to contact your veterinarian to find out how much to give your fur kid. Start slow and be sure not to overdose. It’s also recommended that the product is organic and doesn’t contain pesticides or other chemicals. 

While my own fur kids are not suffering from any of these ailments, now that I know all of this, I will consider giving hemp oil products if their health changes. Have you given it to your fur kid? Would you consider it as well? Share your thoughts with me…leave a comment below or send me an email at info@trinabauerphotography. I’d love to hear your opinions on this subject!


What's in your will?

It’s perhaps one of the most difficult conversations you’ll ever have. But it’s one that every single person should have. Because at some point in your life, just as sure as you are living, you will one day pass away. What’s in your will? 

Recently I lost a good friend of mine. She was originally a pet sitting client of mine, the owner of a border collie named Alex. Working long hours at her corporate job, I walked her dog Alex every weekday at lunchtime. Over the years Alex became one of my favorite dog clients. She fought 3 different types of cancer, and was a trooper through all of the vet appointments and treatments. When it was her time to go, saying goodbye was hard for both her mom and me. A sweet, strong girl, she was sorely missed. 

My client knew she didn’t want to come home to an empty house, and so a brown and white border collie/Australian shepherd mix Tillie came into her life. Tillie quickly won both of our hearts as well as the hearts of everyone she met. A spunky, talkative girl, the house came alive again. From a rescue, this eleven month old puppy was playful, energetic and fun to be around. 

A few years later, Tillie’s mom left the corporate world and started her own business. I was sure that would be the end of our relationship since she was planning to work from home. But she wanted to keep the schedule pretty much the same, knowing she would be working hard to get the business off the ground. The years passed and we got into a comfortable pattern. As we got to know each other, our business relationship evolved into a friendship. We would chat about all kinds of things when I arrived for my walks with Tillie. We covered pretty much everything - current events, weather, family, politics, what we’re reading, what’s happening around town and so on and so on. Being business owners we enjoyed bouncing ideas off each other regarding marketing, social media, blogging, etc. And of course we talked about our dogs. I brought Izzy often to walk with me and Tillie. My friend enjoyed seeing Izzy too, always ending our visits with a special treat for both of the dogs.

Then just over a week ago, I got the dreaded phone call. My client, who I now considered my friend, had passed away. I was sure I misheard the name and took several minutes processing this horrible news. I had just seen her a few days before. She had the flu and had been battling it for weeks, but was slowly getting better. I wished her a great weekend of rest and relaxation and looked forward to seeing her back to her old self the following week. It turned out she didn’t have the flu, but was battling other health issues. The details don’t matter. What does, is that she left behind her beloved dog Tillie.

When her family came into town, they found a will my friend had drawn up, but there was nothing in it about her dog. My friend and I had talked about this a couple of times, but neither of us believed our dogs would outlive us. And really, who wants to talk about death? 

Volunteering at an animal shelter is a constant reminder of how many pets end up displaced because their owners have passed away. While Centre County PAWS is a no kill shelter, and every animal finds a home eventually, it’s still hard on these pets. They’ve lost their family, their homes and everything they ever knew.

Make a plan. Make a backup plan to the backup plan. Then tell your family and closest friends. Call your attorney and make it legal by including it in your will. Be clear. Be specific. Make it easy on your loved ones so they don't have to try to second guess what your wishes are.

In my friend’s case, my husband and I knew that if no one in her family or any of her friends wanted Tillie, we would welcome her into our home. Knowing that she already knew us helped us cope with the sudden addition of another dog and a very full home. It’s been a tough transition, Tillie went through a lot that week. But she is adapting little by little every day.

Kita, too, has had a hard time adapting and honestly we weren’t sure she ever would. But we’ve been seeing progress from her as well as she accepts this scared, nervous and anxious big dog into her life. We’re beginning to see signs that she wants to play and be friends with Tillie. Who knows, maybe one day these two will end up being the best of friends. 

These last couple of weeks have been an emotional roller coaster ride for sure. I’ve been overwhelmed by everything and slowly, I, too, am finding peace with all that has happened. Death is inevitable. No matter how hard we try to hide from it. One day instead of shedding tears, the memories I share with my friend will bring a smile to my face. In the meantime, I will give her beloved dog the best life I can give. And go re-write my will.